I am an athlete. Okay; don’t fall over in shock. I’m 41 now and outside of my kids’ “coaches’ basketball game” three weeks ago, I haven’t played any sports competitively in quite some time. While I am still at my college football playing weight of 185 lbs (give or take a steak or two), it is distributed somewhat differently – my 4.2-percent body fat of age 20 has given way to what seems like 40.2% body fat at age 41. But being an athlete is part of my identity, just as being a Davidson College alum is part of my identity as well.
What is my point? Well, back when I was a college and high school athlete, I had a pet peeve. I used to hate it when people who were not on my teams referred to my team as “we.” After all, THEY weren’t spending hours in the weight room, on the practice fields, in meeting rooms, and watching game film after game film. THEY weren’t making the sacrifices I was making. THEY didn’t leave drops of blood, buckets of sweat, and several tears on the field like I was. I resented the easy way THEY referred to themselves as WE. In high school, I played for a football team that went to the Ohio state championship game (a HUGE deal in Ohio, I assure you) and a basketball team that went to the state Final Four. In college, I played for Davidson teams and got to cover future NFL wide receivers and tackle future NFL running backs. In my immaturity, I hated it when people referred to those teams I played for as “we,” because I didn’t believe they had earned that right.
This is why I almost recoiled in horror as I realized that over the past week, in conversations with congratulators and well wishers over the Davidson basketball team, I heard myself refer to this team as “we.” I LOVE the sports teams I root for –Browns, Cavs, Indians, Buckeyes, and of course Wildcats the most – but I have NEVER referred to any of those teams as “we.”
Then I began to think about it and have reached a conclusion that was heretofore alien to me. This Davidson basketball team is “we.” If Davidson were Ohio State or Tennessee or Illinois (where my wife went) then it wouldn’t be a “we” situation. But Davidson is definitely NOT those schools. Davidson is a “we” school. And all Davidson student-athletes (and just students) have the same kinds of experiences. There is a bond that exists between all of us that transcends mere affiliation and commonalities which might exist at other schools.
We are bound by the Honor Code and dinners at professors’ houses and 8 am classes and 3 p.m. labs and community service and Patterson Court and exacting standards and self-motivation. We are bound by this gorgeous place, our classmates, and our alumni. Oh, other places could make similar claims, I suppose, but at Davidson it is different somehow. The guys on this basketball team (and other Davidson teams) know what it is like to have to study on long plane rides and bus trips. They know what it is like to stagger into an 8 a.m. class because they arrived back home late and had to stay up all night working on a paper or studying for an exam. They know they will be held accountable for what they do off the court in the classroom and on campus. They do what we all do/did. Even non-athletes – whether they are musicians or actors or artists or employees or researchers, what have you – go through the similar rigors and similar experiences by virtue of the fact that Davidson students are self-motivated and do not merely show up in class and go to parties as the sum total of their college experience.
A friend of mine in Ohio recently told me he interviewed a woman who was Davidson grad for a position. I have no idea who she was or what year she graduated. I said two words –“hire her.” I am as confident of her quality as I am of anyone I know personally. She HAS to be quality, because she graduated from this place.
So I/we have made those sacrifices already and continue to make them. Unfortunately, I didn’t get the benefit of team success rewards in college, as we struggled to beat vastly superior Southern Conference football foes such as Marshall, Furman, and Appalachian State. But I loved it. I cared. I sacrificed for it. I learned from it. I’m better for it.
Now, WE have the opportunity to share in nationally cognizable success. So – Jason, Thomas, Boris, Andrew, Max, Can, Stephen, Will, Stephen, Bryant, Dan, Ben, Mike, Aaron, Brendan (hope I’m not forgetting anyone) – please please accept my apologies as I continue to refer to you as “WE!” I have never met any of you, and I haven’t put the time into the gym and the films and the weight room and classes, and homework, and papers, and road trips, etc this year like you have, but I HAVE done it – 20 some odd years ago. And the nice thing about this – and about y’all – is that I don’t think I even need to ask for your permission/forgiveness to continue to refer to you as “we.” I think you already get it. And thank you for teaching me– now a 41-year-old alum – yet another Davidson College lesson.
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